Last week, I was reading through pages of what is hailed as the ‘Guide to perfect parenting’. But, as someone who has transitioned into grand -parenting, I have often asked this question – is there a fail proof formula for perfect parenting? Parents to be and young parents have plenty to learn from their elders.
From the time, an infant opens his/her eyes to this world, the process of learning starts. Parents are the first teachers for the infant. The proximity of the parents and more so the mother is critical in the overall development of a child and during the early days, the baby is wholly dependent on the mother for all the pleasures and pains. As the child grows, the environment plays a crucial role in how he/she moulds to face this vast world.
Many jet set parents have fewer hours to spend with their toddlers. Babysitting and day care centres are flourishing everywhere. In the mad rush to be one up against fierce competition, children are often denied their rightful due – love, compassion and togetherness. Babysitters cannot replace the natural bondage a child has with his/her parents. Toddlers quickly assimilate the deprivation and in the later years, this can turn into serious psychological issues for the child.
Many parents, when they do find some time to spend with their children are either glued to the television sets closer to midnight, inebriated perhaps and even quarrelsome. Little do such parents realise that the child’s memory continuously records every bit of these actions. Similarly, positive steps from the parents also have the same effect and rewards come in the form of a well-groomed child.
Despite all the best attention and efforts from parents, some children do develop certain psychological problems early on in life. But before you decide to seek the help of a psychologist, you should devote quality time understanding your child’s problems.
Every child in this world is unique. Some kids are quiet and learn more from observing than making noise. Some others are excessively playful and boisterous. Another group can be loaded with energy and enjoys throwing a tantrum wherever they are. Remember that a properly nourished child is full of energy during the early years. They have too many questions on topics that any of the elder members would deem silly. Never neglect these issues or dissuade them from being inquisitive.
In the West particularly, hyperactive children quickly earn the tag of an ADHD patient. During the early school days, many teachers are responsible for identifying these children as hyperactive and brand them as fit candidates for psychological treatment. Every parent concerned with possible ADHD issues with their kids should read this very informative article before rushing to a conclusion. If you think your child indeed has a psychological problem, insist on multiple opinions from experts. If treatment is recommended, explore natural remedies. Avoid drugs like cortisones and steroids because you may be unwittingly inflicting long-lasting damage to the health of your child. Think what more attention can do to attention deficit!
That said, there are other unfortunate health issues like autism that affects about 1% of global population. Learning more about autism is a helpful measure in determining the need for intervention by a psychologist. Hopefully, you should never need to consult one!
If you willing to read about how you could stay at home and being a good mother to your children, then don't forget to look at my previous article about "How Being A Stay At Home Mom Affected My Marriage."
Solar power has, slowly and steadily, been making its presence known in the residential sector. With more and more homeowners opting to put solar systems on their homes and properties, it is no wonder that solar power is fast becoming an attractive alternative to traditional energy resources. The fact that it is renewable energy that does not harm our environment makes it all more appealing. But let’s get realistic, No one wants to invest in a system that cannot guarantee a good return on investment however you could have a look at various types of solar panels Euro Solar offers for their customers. So, let’s get right down to it. Do solar panels offer good ROI? Yes, they do. And here’s why:
In the earlier days, when solar power was still a novel concept in the market, high feed-in tariffs is what attracted potential investors to solar systems. Exporting their unused solar electricity to the grid paid them a remarkable amount of money. And money in hand meant that they could recuperate the cost of the solar systems over a few years, and anything they made over and above that amount was a bonus. But, as we all know, things have changed since then. The government has harshly cut back on the feed-in tariffs, which means that making money from your solar power is not as straightforward as it once was. So what does this mean? Are solar systems no longer a good investment? Quite the contrary. The number of people opting for solar power systems has seen a drastic increase over the last five years. Why would people continue to invest in solar energy if they don’t see a good ROI? The fact is that solar power is still a very viable and profitable investment, the only difference being that the strategy has changed. While feed-in tariffs were high at the beginning stages, you need to remember that so was the cost of setting up a solar system. Solar power systems require much lesser than what they used to. That means while you won’t be making as much money from feed-in tariffs, you won’t be spending as much for the initial investment either. Secondly, in the current scenario, getting a good ROI depends on how well you utilise the solar power generated by your system, as opposed to the earlier tactic of exporting your solar electricity back into the grid. Depending on how much energy consumption occurs in your household between 9 am to 5 pm, set up a solar system to accommodate that use. By doing this, you will be cutting down on your electricity bills drastically, saving you an impressive amount each year.
Retail electricity prices are quite unpredictable. We have seen electricity prices rise consistently every six months in the past few years. If this trend keeps up, we can expect to be faced with unpredictable price rise now and then. Having solar power to rely on will help ensure that you are not affected by these fluctuating prices much. And that is an enormous monetary factor to consider when thinking about whether or not to opt for solar power for your house.
If you considering to rent out your property, then it’s a good idea to invest in solar panels. Prospective tenants are more willing to pay higher rents for properties that offer additional facilities such as secure car parking and solar power. It is a win-win situation as your tenants will be saving money on electricity bills and you will be making a little more by way of rent (which will, in turn, help you pay off the amount spent on the installation of the solar system much faster).
Apart from the monetary benefits, one of the major attractions of solar power is the fact that it generates clean energy. Eco-friendly resources are the need of the hour, what with global warming, pollution, and other such disastrous calamities eroding our planet. When you consider the fact that you can reduce your carbon footprint simply by opting for solar energy, your ROI is concerning a better, cleaner, and safer environment for the next generation.
While talking about solar power and its ability to yield good ROI, we need to consider some factors. There is no one-size-fits-all approach when it comes to solar systems. Each person needs to examine his or her situation and determine which system will suit them the best. Some of the major factors to consider:
There are many more factors that come into play which affects how quickly/slowly you will see a return on your investment. If you’re considering installing solar, just do your research. Dig up your electricity bills from the past couple of years to gain a better understanding of how much power is consumed by your household then talk to reputable solar energy companies and ask them about their systems and costs. Ask friends and family who have already installed solar panels to get their perspective on how effective the system has been for them. Solar power has slowly been gaining more followers, and it is touted as one of the best things to have happened in the renewable energy sector. How you make use of it depends on what you hope to achieve and how much you’re willing to invest in a long-term investment.
Being a stay at home mum is an invaluable opportunity that allows us, women, to have a deep connection with the lives of our children, especially the young toddlers and infants who are with us all day. It is an opportunity I never thought I would be fortunate enough to take, and I am thankful relationship counselling experts very day that help my family and make it work. But being a stay at home mum does not come without its challenges.
If your husband works outside of the home, having the sole responsibility of the children day after day can be exhausting. Trying to entertain young children with the same routine doesn’t end up working for long. There are plenty of days we forget to feed ourselves, and some days it seems like the housework, childcare, and self-care are impossible to balance. Despite all of that, seeing your children grow each day and be successful individuals, somehow makes all the sacrifice worth it. However, what most people don’t think about is the impact that being a stay at home mum can have a marriage.
When we first discussed the possibility of me staying at home with our two kids, I was already hesitant. I had been laid off shortly after our son was born in 2010, and the tight financial situation was enough to strain our marriage then. Although my husband was in a significantly different income bracket at this point, I still struggled with the idea of what supporting two children and a home on one income would look like. Although I deflected most of my concern on our budget, no matter how many times we ran the numbers without issues, my real concern was feeling like my husband would think I wasn’t contributing enough at home.
Due to my husband’s career, he had never done a lot of the hands-on work with our kids, and while I had brief post-partum stints, I didn’t have the experience to know exactly how much work went into raising a 1 and 4-year-old largely by myself.
At first, things went great. I tried to entertain the kids with trips to the zoo and aquarium, and we worked on learning pre-school level skills like shapes, numbers, and letters. But too quickly, my husband began making comments on the lack of housework that his housewife appeared to be doing. Laundry piled up, and toys were always all over the room more often than not, and before I knew it, my husband grumbled at me one morning “This place is always disgusting.”
My heart sunk. It wasn’t like I was intentionally neglecting our home, and most basic things were being done daily. I still vacuumed, dusted, cleaned surfaces, kept our kids fed, entertained, and healthy. I got the shopping done, as well as tried to get the kids involved in small groups. But, laundry did dwindle down to twice a week, and dishes, although usually done once a day, still somehow piled up in the sink. His offhanded comment about my lack of housework skills, ate at me. I knew how much I was enjoying being at home with my kids, and I didn’t want that opportunity to be ruined because of housework, so I vowed to make some changes.
I woke up earlier, started breakfast for everyone right away, then cleaned the kitchen. I would immediately start doing laundry, vacuuming, and dusting every day. I prepared all three meals from scratch and dedicated a good chunk of my day to sorting closets, organising boxes in the garage, and trying to clean every inch of my house.
But the more I did this the more unhappy I became. I was supposed to be a stay at home mum and not a stay at the home maid. My husband began commenting about how early I had begun going to sleep, and how come the kids seemed so riled up. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I was exhausted because I spent hours cleaning, and kids didn’t get to go out and play that day.
What ensued was one of the lowest points of our marriage. I quickly began to resent my husband. He got to leave home every day, interact with other adults, and come home to a place where everything had been done for him. Meanwhile, I was exhausted and feeling spread too thin. I began ignoring my husband simply because being around him was a constant reminder about my bitter feelings.
I became short-tempered with him, and my kids. I felt trapped in my home and I fell into depression. I consulted with a therapist shortly after, and she let me know that the root of my depression was the fact that I had lost all of my identity. I wasn’t going out with friends, I wasn’t engaging with my kids, and most importantly I wasn’t engaging with my husband. I had isolated myself in a place where I was working all day with no recognition.
I knew something had to change so I finally approached my husband about my feelings. I expected a heartfelt apology, followed by a sudden feeling that everything was going to get better. To my devastation, this is not what happened. My husband began to argue back that my staying home was a terrible mistake, because either I was miserable all of the time or the house was always a mess. He felt that he was putting all his effort into making a one income family successful, and I was doing nothing on my end to make things work.
I challenged my husband to do what I did for one day. The following day I left home and tasked him with having the house clean and all of the child rearing responsibilities completely, as well as having dinner warm on the table by the time I got home. If he was successful, we would agree that I was not meant to be a stay at home mum, and I would go back to the workforce.
When I walked through the door at 5:00 p.m. that day, the site that met my eyes was one of the most satisfying, vindicating, ones I could have ever hoped for. It looked like a bomb went off, and centred at the middle was a humble, more open minded man. There was crayon on the walls, piles of dirty dishes and laundry everywhere. And as he begged our one-year-old to eat something he looked at me and muttered: “I haven’t gotten to dinner yet.”
As you can imagine this was a major turning point in our marriage. Although we still struggle at times with equality of tasks, it has never again resorted to feeling like only one of us was supporting the weight of our family on one set of shoulders. The biggest influence in changing the trajectory of our marriage was an acknowledgement that we are a team, and realising that we both work very hard at what we do, despite having very different jobs.